The Rules of People, 2nd Edition

The Rules of People, 2nd Edition

by Richard Templar
Released November 2022
Publisher(s): Pearson Education
ISBN: 9781292441139

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Book description

A personal code for getting the best from everyone.

We all know someone who is a natural ‘people person’. They seem to understand what people really want, what they really think and what they really mean. They can effortlessly get people onside, and keep them happy and motivated.

Is there something they know that the rest of us don't? Is it something we can all learn? The answer is a resounding yes. They know The Rules of People.

These Rules are the guiding principles that show you how to connect with strangers, build strong relationships with friends and colleagues, and even get the best out of difficult people. They will help you say the right thing, do the right thing, and know instinctively how to handle every situation. You’ll have relaxed, easy relationships and you’ll be that person who gets on with everyone.

This edition includes a new bonus section, 10 Rules for Socialising, to help you enjoy a relaxed social life by doing it in ways that suit you.

You can be that natural 'people person' that everyone else aspires to be.

Table of contents

  1. Cover Page
  2. Title
  3. Copyright
  4. Contents
  5. Acknowledgements
  6. Introduction
  7. How to use the Rules
  8. Understanding people
    1. 1 Understanding helps
    2. 2 No one has to be like you
    3. 3 People hear what they want to hear
    4. 4 People believe what they want to believe
    5. 5 Your attitude influences their response
    6. 6 Remember your first impression
    7. 7 People are tribal
    8. 8 Everyone wants to feel valued
    9. 9 They only tease you if they like you
    10. 10 ... but banter isn’t teasing
    11. 11 Everyone else is insecure too
    12. 12 Spots don’t change
    13. 13 Behaviour isn’t character
    14. 14 Other people’s relationships are a mystery
    15. 15 Big words are there to impress you
    16. 16 Confrontation can be scary
    17. 17 People feel nervous because they care
    18. 18 Angry people are sad people
    19. 19 Crying isn’t always sad
    20. 20 Some people just don’t think
    21. 21 Square pegs don’t fit in round holes
    22. 22 Wild and wacky isn’t always fun
    23. 23 It’s hard being 13
    24. 24 They’ll shout if you do
    25. 25 Responsibility creates independence
    26. 26 Teenagers hate you because they love you
    27. 27 Talking is what matters
    28. 28 Listening is what matters
    29. 29 No one likes saying sorry
    30. 30 The world is full of rebels
    31. 31 Some weirdos are great people
  9. Helping people
    1. 32 Put your oxygen mask on first
    2. 33 Get in the swamp
    3. 34 It’s OK just to feel
    4. 35 Listen, don’t solve
    5. 36 Know your limitations
    6. 37 It’s not a competition
    7. 38 Never give advice
    8. 39 Accept their decision
    9. 40 Give them control
    10. 41 Get them to think for themselves
    11. 42 Learn to be psychic
    12. 43 Listen to what they don’t say
    13. 44 People who can’t find an answer may not want one
    14. 45 Don’t tell people to move on
    15. 46 Loneliness is a state of mind
    16. 47 Give them privacy
    17. 48 All interactions are positive or negative
    18. 49 Not everyone wants help
  10. Getting them on your side
    1. 50 Loyalty runs both ways
    2. 51 Remember the details
    3. 52 Flattery should never be empty
    4. 53 Praise effectively
    5. 54 Keep your praise in proportion
    6. 55 People want to be liked
    7. 56 Earn their respect
    8. 57 Have a sense of humour
    9. 58 Don’t be scared to admit your mistakes
    10. 59 Be tolerant
    11. 60 Make individual relationships
    12. 61 Turn the best side to the front
    13. 62 People generally agree with themselves
    14. 63 Credit people with your own ideas
    15. 64 Don’t tell them they’re wrong (even if they are)
    16. 65 Get them to collaborate
    17. 66 Be human
    18. 67 Share
    19. 68 Say thank you properly
    20. 69 Get under their skin
    21. 70 Criticise constructively
    22. 71 Agree without agreeing
    23. 72 Let them win
    24. 73 Make it three-dimensional
    25. 74 Give and take
    26. 75 Know what you both want
    27. 76 Get all their cards on the table
    28. 77 Give them a get-out
    29. 78 Never be scared
    30. 79 Don’t get caught on the hop
  11. Difficult people
    1. 80 There’s only one person you can change
    2. 81 It’s scary being controlled
    3. 82 If they feel small, they’ll big themselves up
    4. 83 Shouty people want to be heard
    5. 84 Negative people can’t half be useful
    6. 85 Control freaks know they’re right
    7. 86 Blackmailers want to control you
    8. 87 Insecurity can cause mistrust
    9. 88 Prejudice comes from ignorance
    10. 89 Martyrs crave recognition
    11. 90 Sensitive people can’t toughen up
    12. 91 People will listen if it’s in their interest
    13. 92 Passive-aggressive people fear conflict
    14. 93 Patronising can be accidental
    15. 94 You can’t beat a true narcissist
    16. 95 Moaners don’t want to change
    17. 96 Competitive complainers don’t just need a whinge
    18. 97 Secrets are full of power
    19. 98 Some people just can’t lose
    20. 99 Manipulation is more than just persuasion
    21. 100 Busy people are less trouble
  12. The Rules of Socialising
  13. Had enough yet . . . ?

Product information

  • Title: The Rules of People, 2nd Edition
  • Author(s): Richard Templar
  • Release date: November 2022
  • Publisher(s): Pearson Education
  • ISBN: 9781292441139