The Negotiation Book: Your Definitive Guide To Successful Negotiating

8.1. THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING DISPASSIONATE

The decisions you take and the way you behave during your negotiations will be influenced by how much power you think you have and by the way your own values or ethics shape your judgement.

It is also true that the tactics you choose to use in your negotiations will firstly be limited by how much power you have and whether you have a short- or long-term relationship to consider. This in turn may influence how ethical you choose to be during your negotiations.

You may regard trust, respect, integrity, honesty, openness, consideration, compassion and empathy as important social values, but at the point where you convert these into a desire to be fair in negotiation your judgement and your deals can become compromised (see page 179, Chapter 6).

The dilemma of where the value of fairness fits into negotiation has challenged many. For instance, many who hold strong views on being fair and reasonable, when faced with another party who behave in a manipulative and irrational manner, allow this to affect them emotionally in that the principle of conducting business with people who behave in this manner cannot be tolerated. Many become irritated or even antagonised to the point where they decide to walk away from discussions, even though there was a deal to be done.

Ultimately, you cannot afford to allow your emotions to influence your judgement in negotiation. Try to be dispassionate and to recognise the tactics in play used by others. You need ...