chapter 25

Child A or Child B?

Going Through a DivorceWithout WreckingYour Kids for Life

Divorce is brutal, and when kids are involved, it’s doubly so. As a psychiatrist, I’ve spent way too many hours of my life listening to divorcing parents screaming at each other about who loves the kids more, who’s screwed them up the most, and who’s getting them on Thanksgiving Day.

Unfortunately, these shouting matches don’t just happen in a shrink’s or a lawyer’s office; they also happen at home. And when kids overhear these battles—especially when parents keep screaming about the same issues without ever resolving anything—it can traumatize them in lasting ways. I know, because I hear about it decades later.

If you and your partner are heading for a ...

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